New Rules For Weekend Hackers!

All of us know we have to play the ball as it lies and we cannot ground the club in a bunker and a plethora of other rules. Well – it’s time for some new rules for the weekend hackers.

Here we go:

1. If you suck at golf, do NOT give tips. Your tips will make people worse.

2. It is a fruitless exercise trying to convince your friends you shot a 79 yesterday, when you shot a 120 today. Don’t bother.

3. If you suck at putting, lining up the line on your ball to the hole, will not help and plumbing bobbing the putt is a waste of time.

4. Do not walk around the green when someone is trying to putt. We know you are going to miss the putt, but, why make someone else miss their putt.

5. Don’t mark your ball when it is 2 inches from the hole. Pick it up and move on. If you are worried you are going to miss that putt, there are other problems we need to talk about.

6. Feeling exhausted in the middle of the round? Stop taking 10 practice swings before every shot.

7. Fix your ball marks. The group playing behind you does not include your butler.

8. Don’t waste time marking your ball when there is no other ball in your vicinity. Trust me when I say that gravity will force the ball to stay where it is.

9. Visualizing the shot before you take a swing does not help when topping the ball is your problem. Go take lessons!

10. If you only hit 200 yards off the tee and you are 250 yards from the green.  Don't wait for the green to clear.

11.  It is not necessary to have a beer per hole.  Playing with drunks is no fun.

12.  Just because your game sucks today, there is no need to take it out on everybody.

13.  Spitting sunflower seeds, flipping ashes, spitting tobacco, etc. is not helping the superintendent with special fertilizer.

14.  CART PATH ONLY TODAY signs are for a reason.  Pay attention to them.

15.  If you need to stand on the green and count your strokes, just take an X.

16.  If there is a hole open in front of you then you are playing too slow.  No excuses.

17.  If you have to take or make multiple phone calls, quit and go back to the office.
18.  If you can't break a hundred you do not need a range finder.

19.  When someone in the 19th hole asks what you shot today they only want a number - not a shot by shot recap.

And finally…

10. Stop being a cheap ass and buy your friends a round of beer after eighteen. They will appreciate the gesture and will give you less crap the next time you play.